Every organization has heard some version of it.
“Don’t shoot the messenger. This came from corporate.”
“I know it doesn’t make sense, but that’s what leadership wants.”
“I’m just telling you what they told me.”
Most managers think they’re being empathetic when they say things like this. They want employees to know they’re “on their side.”
Unfortunately, that’s exactly the problem.
Without realizing it, they’ve positioned themselves on one team and leadership on another. Employees hear, “Your manager agrees this decision is terrible.” Leadership hears, “Our managers aren’t backing us.” Before long, every change becomes a battle, every announcement is met with skepticism, and trust starts eroding one conversation at a time.
Managers who consistently distance themselves from organizational decisions create an “us vs. them” culture where employees stop seeing themselves as part of one organization. Instead, they see two opposing camps: the people making bad decisions and the people suffering through them.
The Sneaky Ways Managers Create Division
Most managers don’t wake up intending to sabotage culture. In fact, they’re often trying to protect their teams. The problem is that protection can quickly become separation.
Employees may appreciate the honesty in the moment, but over time these comments reinforce a dangerous belief: the manager is an ally against leadership instead of a leader within the organization.
Eventually, employees stop bringing solutions because they’ve already decided nothing will change. Managers stop advocating because they believe they have no influence. Leadership assumes managers have buy-in because no one is raising meaningful concerns.
Everyone loses.
How Managers Can Break the Cycle
Managers do far more than communicate organizational decisions. They shape whether employees buy into them. McKinsey found that the odds of a successful transformation increase by 5.2 times when managers help employees understand the case for change.
If you’re hearing a lot of “corporate says…” in your organization, don’t coach managers to simply defend every executive decision.
That isn’t leadership either. Instead, teach them to become translators and problem-solvers.
Get Curious Before You Get Defensive
When someone says they’re frustrated, resist the urge to explain the policy. Start by understanding the frustration. Questions like these often reveal the real issue:
- What part of this concerns you most?
- How is this affecting your work?
- What would make this easier?
- Is this something we can improve internally?
Many concerns don’t require executive approval. They require a manager willing to listen.
Help Managers Recognize Their Sphere of Influence
Managers often underestimate how much authority they actually have. Maybe they can’t rewrite company policy. But they can usually improve communication, adjust workflows, clarify expectations, remove unnecessary friction, or advocate for their teams with better information.
Stop Using “Corporate” as the Villain
The phrase feels harmless. It’s not. Every time a manager distances themselves from leadership, they chip away at organizational trust.
Instead of saying: “Corporate decided this.” Try: “Here’s why we’re making this change. Let’s talk about what concerns you and what we can influence together.”
One statement creates separation. The other creates partnership.
Teach Managers to Carry Information Both Ways
Managers aren’t simply responsible for delivering messages from leadership. They’re responsible for bringing valuable information back to the organization.
That only happens when employees believe their concerns will actually be heard. Listening isn’t passive. It’s intelligence gathering.
The organizations that adapt fastest aren’t necessarily the ones with the smartest executives. They’re the ones whose managers consistently surface problems before they become crises.
Our Manager Evolution Lab helps managers develop these skills through hands-on learning, coaching, and real-world application so they become leaders who build trust, navigate change effectively, and unite teams instead of unintentionally dividing them.
Give Employees the Confidence to Speak Up, Too
Managers play a critical role in preventing an “us vs. them” culture, but they shouldn’t carry the responsibility alone.
Employees also need to know how to speak up when they see conversations becoming divisive, hear colleagues fueling an “us vs. them” narrative, or witness disrespectful behavior that chips away at trust. Unfortunately, many organizations tell people to “speak up” without ever teaching them how.
That’s where our Building a Speak-Up Culture™ Toolkit comes in.
The toolkit gives HR professionals, managers, and internal facilitators everything they need to teach employees how to intervene respectfully and confidently before everyday frustrations escalate into formal complaints or larger culture problems. Instead of hoping people will do the right thing in difficult moments, you’ll equip them with practical tactics they can use immediately.
The program includes ready-to-use presentation slides, a facilitator guide, participant materials, and additional resources so you can deliver the training whenever your organization needs it. It’s the same program organizations have invested thousands of dollars to bring in-house, now available for you to purchase for just $249.
When people know they’ll be supported and have the skills to step in constructively, you’ll see fewer interpersonal conflicts reaching HR, stronger collaboration across teams, and greater confidence in addressing issues early instead of letting them fester.
And if you’re thinking, “What if I deliver this training and someone challenges me by asking, ‘Why do we even need this training?’ Watch our expert facilitator, Dr. Toni Herndon, demonstrate exactly how she responds to that challenge with confidence, curiosity, and credibility. It’s a simple shift that not only answers the question but also reinforces why upstander skills matter in today’s workplace
Every healthy workplace starts with one conversation. Schedule a call with our team to discuss how we can help you build a culture where people speak up, step in, and support one another.
Sincerely,
Catherine & The Civility Partners Team
