Some things are NOT better left unsaid

by Oct 23, 2018

When you first start at an organization, there is tons and tons of paperwork. Sometimes it feels like you are signing your life away!

From tax forms to acknowledging receipt of the employee handbook, you and the organization make a lot of explicit promises to each other.

 

Why Some things are NOT better left unsaid

For example, you make a commitment to refrain from sexually harassing a coworker, while the organization makes a commitment to investigate any sexual harassment claims that are filed.

What’s often forgotten, but probably more important, is the psychological contract both parties sign when a new hire starts.

Think for a second about that implied contract. While the new hire is signing that paperwork, they are thinking, “this employer better furnish a safe and respectful work environment free of harm, and where I can be my best self.”

On the other side of the table, the employer representative is thinking, “this employee better work hard to achieve goals, and to behave in the best interest of this company.”

If this unsaid contract is perceived to be broken the relationship between employer and employee is damaged. The employee disengages, unintentionally or intentionally reduces effort, and maybe even quits.

The employer might also take disciplinary action to try to force better performance.

For example, if the behavior of the abrasive leader in your organization is not being addressed, employees come to believe the employer is failing to uphold their side of the contract – the one that was never explicitly stated.

Something interesting about this contract is that, because it’s unsaid, it’s unstable. Perceptions about what each party owes the other is just that – a perception.

My advice – make the implicit contract explicit. Ask what employee expectations are and then write them down.

 

Recommendation

When new employees start, make sure managers sit down with them and discuss their working relationship, what they expect from the employee, and what the employee expects of them.

I recommend they put all that in a written document and sign it.

Another way employers can keep their end of the bargain is by creating a healthy workplace policy that sets expectations on how everyone should behave, rather than telling them the consequences of behaving poorly. I have a template policy here, to make it a little easier for you!

And, consistently discuss performance expectations for both parties.

By making performance conversations more collaborative and by documenting them, managers and employees can remain apprised of what the psychological contract is and what changes were made over time.

It all boils down to creating an environment where employees are comfortable expressing their concerns and their own expectations, and where leaders can do the same. The contract is then less likely to be perceived as broken, and when it is, you can have a collaborative conversation about it.

Remember, open communication is key!

Sincerely,

Catherine

P.S If you want to learn more about the explicit versus implicit promises you make as an employer, join me for a free webinar on Culture and Compliance: Why & How Both Drive Business Success, on Nov 7 at 10 am PST. I have a ton of useful nuggets for you and as always, some cool bonuses.

Registration is explicit. 🙂

Incivility, bullying, and harassment occur because the culture allows them to. Before starting inclusivity initiatives, you’ve got to stop bad behavior. Take this assessment to determine if your workplace fosters a positive culture.

 

About Catherine Mattice

Catherine Mattice, MA, SPHR, SHRM-SCP is President of consulting and training firm, Civility Partners, and has been successfully providing programs in workplace bullying and building positive workplaces since 2007. Her clients include Fortune 500’s, the military, several universities and hospitals, government agencies, small businesses and nonprofits. She has published in a variety of trade magazines and has appeared several times on NPR, FOX, NBC, and ABC as an expert, as well as in USA Today, Inc Magazine, Huffington Post, Entrepreneur Magazine, and more. Catherine is Past-President of the Association for Talent Development (ATD), San Diego Chapter and teaches at National University. In his book foreword, Ken Blanchard called her book, BACK OFF! Your Kick-Ass Guide to Ending Bullying at Work, “the most comprehensive and valuable handbook on the topic.” She recently released a second book entitled, SEEKING CIVILITY: How Leaders, Managers and HR Can Create a Workplace Free of Bullying.

Your CEO thinks HR is operational, not strategic?

Do these comments resonate with you?  Owners don’t understand that we’re not just paperwork. HR is a punching bag expected to resolve everyone’s mess. There’s no HR budget, no support, and a team of 2 for 300+ employees. Even after a workforce survey, leadership still...

Free Webinar: Unlock Your Managers’ Leadership Potential

Being good at your job doesn’t make you good at managing people. You know this.  You also know the outcome when an individual contributor moves to a manager role without receiving the right training – a struggling team, unclear expectations, conflict, disengaged...

5 Tools for Pitching Culture Change to Leadership

You already know that a strong culture leads to engaged employees, lower turnover, and a healthier bottom line, but convincing leadership? That’s a different story. It's exhausting pushing for changes that are dismissed as “soft skills” or shot down because they don't...

Why leadership’s ‘Hands-Off’ approach to culture is costing you more than you think

Picture this: you’re actively working to foster a positive workplace culture, but managers and leaders are adopting a 'hands-off' approach. At first, it seems harmless, even convenient—but beneath the surface, it's quietly wreaking havoc. Top talent? They're slipping...

Elections and Leadership: 3 Ways Your Reaction Can Impact Your Team

Election season tends to bring division and tension, and it’s hard to avoid. Even if you’ve reminded your team to steer clear of political conversations at work, it’s likely that the topic will still pop up here and there. The truth is, having employees with different...

You Have It All Wrong: 4 Ways Employers Can Successfully Influence Well-Being

Did you know that the World Health Organization (WHO) classified burnout as an occupational phenomenon? In other words, while leaders and HR tend to classify burnout as a personal failing, as evidenced in the way they tackle it with offerings of gym memberships and...

5 Tips You Haven’t Seen for Engaging Hybrid And Remote Workers

According to Forbes, one in five workers is working remotely and 98% of workers want to work remotely at least some of the time. Yet, despite the flexibility that hybrid and remote work offer, engagement is a major challenge. In fact, the 2023 State of Remote Work...

Measuring Onboarding Effectiveness: Key Metrics for Success

Having an employee orientation program is a great start. It usually involves getting paperwork signed, introducing new hires around the office, and providing some initial training. But are you truly onboarding your employees? Effective onboarding is more than just a...

Measuring Recruiting and Hiring Success: Key Metrics to Track

In the past, recruiting was often a "spray and pray" approach—posting job openings everywhere and hoping the right candidate would find their way to us, even faxing over their resumes. Thankfully, recruiting today is far more strategic, thanks to the internet and...

HR Ninja-ing: 9 ways to impact culture with $0 budget

Workplace culture is an uphill battle when the budget is tight or, worse, nonexistent. You’re expected to create a thriving, engaged workforce, but the reality is harsh: Gallup reports that only 32% of U.S. employees are engaged at work. Meanwhile, disengaged...