Don’t Be A Victim Of Your Own Perception

by Jul 21, 2012

We are victims of our own perception.

We make judgment calls all day long about the people we come across and the places we go. We perceive the situation we’re in with the bully as a reality, where there’s nothing that can be done about it – because it’s a reality. But you can change your perception, and therefore you can change your reality.

When you get to work, do you think about how horrible your day is going to be because of that mean ol’ bully? What about going to work and thinking about how positive your day will be because you are better than that little twirp who goes out of his way to make you miserable? Instead of harping on the asshole with your co-workers, and dwelling in how much you despise him, start gearing your co-worker conversations towards how much you like each other, your jobs and your company. Don’t focus on the negativity the bully brings to your workplace.

As you change your perception of your situation you’ll notice your reality will change. Your perception can in fact be rewarding, if you focus on staying positive.

Don’t be a victim of your own perception, change your attitudes, change your life.

Incivility, bullying, and harassment occur because the culture allows them to. Before starting inclusivity initiatives, you’ve got to stop bad behavior. Take this assessment to determine if your workplace fosters a positive culture.

 

Catherine

About Catherine Mattice

Catherine Mattice, MA, SPHR, SHRM-SCP, is the founder/CEO of Civility Partners, an organizational development firm focused on helping organizations create respectful workplace cultures and specializing in turning around toxic cultures. Civility Partners’ clients range from Fortune 500s to small businesses across many industries. Catherine is a TEDx speaker and an HR thought leader who has appeared in such venues as USA Today, Bloomberg, CNN, NPR, and many other national news outlets as an expert. She’s an award-winning speaker, author, and blogger and has 60+ courses reaching global audiences on LinkedIn Learning. Her fourth book, Navigating Toxic Work Environments For Dummies (Wiley), is available in all major bookstores and where audiobooks are sold.

AI Could Kill Humans in the Next Decade?? Leaders, Here Are 4 Things You Can Do Now

There are headlines you read, shake your head at, and move on from. Then there are headlines like this one: AI could kill all humans within the next decade. It sounds like the plot of a sci-fi movie. Some of the people raising these concerns are building the...

Why Are People So Sensitive? 4 Things Have Changed at Work

“Why is everyone so sensitive these days?” I hear some version of this all the time. Employees are offended by everything. Managers can’t say anything anymore. People need constant reassurance. Nobody can take a joke. Everyone has to walk on eggshells. And usually,...

How to Deal With an Angry Boss in 4 Steps

A few years ago, we published “Three More Brilliant Tips for Dealing with an Angry Boss,” and it continues to get a surprising amount of attention. Apparently, angry bosses aren't going out of style. So we figured it was time for an update - not because you need five...

3 Signs Toxic Leaders Have No Idea They’re Toxic

Wait… before you come for me, hear me out. As a coach who specializes in working with leaders who engage in toxic behavior, I’ve noticed a pattern that might surprise you: toxic leaders aren’t always the villains we assume they are. I know. Stay with me. When you hear...

Wait… HR Made Workplace Bullying Worse?

You’ve got a lot on your plate. Employee relations, compliance, performance issues, culture, and the occasional grown adult who apparently needs to be reminded not to terrorize their coworkers. Making workplace bullying worse certainly isn’t supposed to be on the...

3 Culture Band-Aids That Create Bigger Organizational Risk (And What to Do Instead)

Netflix recently found itself in the headlines for all the wrong reasons. According to a recently filed lawsuit, a Netflix executive participated in a company retreat that included a "vulnerability-trust exercise." During the exercise, he disclosed that he had...

Join our Workplace Intelligence Series + Office Hours

Every day, you are expected to solve increasingly complex workplace challenges. A bullying complaint lands on your desk. A high performer is damaging team morale. Burnout continues to climb despite your wellness initiatives. Managers struggle with difficult...

Do Your Managers Create an “Us vs. Them” Mentality? Here’s How to Know and What to Do About It.

Every organization has heard some version of it. "Don't shoot the messenger. This came from corporate." "I know it doesn't make sense, but that's what leadership wants." "I'm just telling you what they told me." Most managers think they're being empathetic when they...

4 Mistakes That Turn a Necessary Layoff Into a Culture Crisis

Most leaders think the layoff is the hard part. It isn't. The difficult conversations, severance packages, and notifications are emotionally draining, but they aren't where organizations win or lose their culture. The real challenge begins the next morning, when...

3 Ways Gatekeepers Sabotage Real Workplace Change

Recently an employer’s attorney contacted us looking for workplace training for her client. She described what she called "longstanding" workplace issues and stated she was looking for a training program to resolve them. As I explained that training likely isn’t the...